I was pondering the making and growing of children, this morning. Not a subject often bantered about. But in my mind, the most important job we hold - as a human race.
I understand that in a perfect state of being, continuing to create children in society's present manner, is ideal and beautiful - from a philosophical perspective. During the moment two potential parents are at their closest, that a new being evolves from that Love and bonding, is - well - the stuff about which poets and philosophers have written for eons.
Yet realistically - particularly considering the problems we create in this society when children are created NOT in such philosophical bliss, what then? And even if they are, is this simplistic situation, the ultimate avenue for the continuation of our society?
Children created and raised in less than perfect households - children neglected and abused, not only involuntarily embrace a tortured existence to varying degrees, but sometimes, grow up to lead us. Hitler was an abused child, as were other historical leaders. With each generation, our children will recreate our world, over and over again. Yes, I believe they are truly - society's most valuable resource.
Let's look at how we handle that resource. First, let me preempt this continued discussion with a disclaimer; I do not - under any circumstances, believe that we need yet - more government intervention in our little lives; nohow, nowhere, notime.
So let's continue from a philosophical approach, which will - hopefully - grow into an educational approach; maybe someday, solutions to this problem will evolve into a more positive, more intellectual, more enlightened and aware system...for the improved future of our world.
Society trains and prepares it's citizens for important jobs;
-Doctorates in Psychology to heal problematic emotional situations in life. Why do we not preempt these problems and train our parents in this area BEFORE the problems are created? Do we test parents emotionally to assure our society that this paramount position is in healthy hands?
-We train our economists with Bachelor and Doctorates to keep our world finances in order. Do we train our parents in this area? Do they have degrees in how to save monies for the children they so freely create, how to make sure their finances have adequate reserves to cover child-rearing expenses such as education, etc?
-Most corporations and governmental agencies screen their applicants for important positions such that their companies flourish. How do we screen the parents in which we place the future of the world? Why is that not given the same import, the same attention, the same educational and psychological health requirements? Is the job of producing the next generation...not important enough to require, no - mandate - the best situation for child-rearing?
Instead, we leave child-rearing to " mother's and father's intuition". What exactly, is that? I could NOT find an exact definition. I encourage you to search out this basis...on which we place - the future of our world.
If we take a hard, thorough look at our history - in this new perspective of child-rearing, we might decide we need a 'new plan'. That is, if we care about our future on this planet.
How can our society implement this new approach? Certainly NOT by more government regulation; certainly not by genocide or other 'after-the-fact' solutions. Certainly NOT by letting our children run wild and free, without structure. So how do we solve this problem?
So far, no new solutions exist. And I have few clues myself, about any solutions. But I believe in my soul of souls, that an enormous problem exists, in desperate need of change.
Without any new ideas, we maintain our present system of procreation...anytime, anywhere, any reason and certainly without training or preparedness to any degree. And the resulting continuation/re-creation of a society that is just as unstable, uneducated, unhealthy....as are so many of it's children, waiting their time to take positions of power and leadership over us.
If you are so moved, the following website from a prolific author on this subject, Alice Miller, can provide new, innovative and powerful insights into the ultimate connection between society and the children it creates. http://www.alice-miller.com/index_en.php?page=2. One of her publications on this subject, Prisoners of Childhood, gave me insight not gained through other writings by other authors.
Since my 60-something enculturation entailed the acceptance of an occasional spanking (on the backside only), when the situation warranted, I still grapple with this author's - and our present social services, etal., perspective of absolutely no spanking at all. Parents must have control of their children, to keep them safe and guide them into healthy, educated, responsible paths. Children - in order to function in a healthy society, MUST learn to abide by rules and regulations. Chaos never did anything...except provide theories for higher math books.
So, how we can accomplish that balanced arena of control and training - without any spanking, is difficult for me to accept. Let continued research find the answers.
But "discipline" and "violence" - MUST BE - worlds apart.
I ask that you contemplate this problem. If it takes a 'village' to raise a child, it may take a 'society' - with it's best interest at heart...to propagate a better world.
As always, Nature prevails.